Day 2.

its only 12:03 in the afternoon....

but i've already broke down as soon as I stepped in the door.

everything in my house screams your name. How could I be happy here anymore?

Too, too, too, too many memories.

This is the part where I sit back and look at myself in the 3rd person P.O.V....

this is what I see when I look at myself..

a scared individual.

a confused individual.

but an individual that is putting one foot in front of the other..

and taking baby steps back to regaining trust.

because i'm doing anything and everything to prove it.. by ACTIONS.

here i am again, 6:11 pm

I wonder what I would've been doing right now, if I hadn't ruined my chances.

Its hard, but I have to face this today. I have to face this tomorrow. and I have to face this as long as I have to, until I prove myself. And that's ok. I never did any of this to make you hate me. I did this, because it was a way of showing me I have to learn from MY OWN mistakes.. and not others. Completely opposite from what I had originally thought.. and thats okay.

its november 10th. it woulda been A WHOLE 'nother year today.. I still remember standing on your steps in such excitement. how I would do anything to get that moment back.

no one and nothing was worth this pain I have, and that he has.

NO ONE.